Epic Guide|Mostly Harmless

I’ve been absent for a week, so prepare for a huge post. Personally, I don’t own any fur. I might have some leather shoes or belts. But my lack of animal skin does not mean I do not support it. On Sunday there was another animal protest In Los Angeles. Now while I am by no means supportive of animal cruelty, I cannot stress enough that animals do not have any right what-so-ever.

The headline of the protest was “Please join our protest against the fur trade in China where they are skinning alive Two Million dogs and cats for their fur and 37 million other wild animals.” Let’s look at this statement carefully. First off, they are bashing poor China whose fur industry makes 2.5 billion dollars according to the animal lovers’ statement. I’m not a China activist in the slightest, but China has a lot of really poor people. If they have a 2.5 billion dollar industry, I say fantastic; that means less poor people in the world. However, animal activists do not care about good things for humans. The second part of the statement says that the animals are “skinned alive.” Tell me, what kind of retard skins an animal alive? This statement honestly has got to be one of the biggest pieces of fabricated dog poop that I have ever seen. Why would you skin an animal alive? Animals that are alive can bite you, they can claw you, they are fidgety. Do skinners like a challenge or something? I guarantee that they are killed before they are skinned. The third piece of this statement is the use of the terms “dogs and cats” to stir up emotion. Dogs and cats have an important place in Americans’ hearts. That is the reason these activists used it. However, I eat cows, I’m sure most of you reading this also eat cows. Hindus think cows are gods. In China, dogs and cats are viewed as friendly food (food that was once your friend). Just because you like dogs and cats doesn’t mean that the Chinese have to.

Now, why don’t animals have rights? Because rights are granted by peoples. Every right you have is protected by the government. Unfortunately, animals do not have governments, so they have no way of upholding their rights (one of the perks of being a superior being). Are we responsible for animals? No; if you disagree, just tell me why we should be responsible for animals, I will destroy your arguement. Animals are self sufficient entities. You are only responsible for dependent entities, enough said. Furthermore, if you do not believe we are superior beings, than that means we have even right to wear their skin and eat their innards. If we are equals, and there is truly some animals right crap, then there is a huge problem. Do you know what is worse than wearing skin? Eating it. Predators not only eat the animals’ innards but they also eat the skin. They even eat baby animals. If we are equal, we need to stop lions from eating gazelles, wolves from eating moose, killer whales from eating seals. Guess what other animals’ rights are violated by other animals… Ants herd aphids in the same way that we herd cattle. Basically, the ants own the aphids like slaves, and that technically violates the aphids rights to freedom.

If that isn’t enough proof that animals do not deserve rights, consider this: Why does the metazoa have more rights than the Embryophyta or the Fungi? We are all forms of life, what deems one life form superior than the other? Why can we eat, wear and kill plant life but not animal life? Personally I know; It’s the same reason humans can eat, wear and kill animals. Here is a link to a site I found which contains animal-wacko quotes: it’s furs.com. To end this epic blog I want to quote myself with a saying that I have been using for many a year: “I wouldn’t eat the little bastards if they didn’t taste so damn good,” I put that on a t-shirt.