Epic Guide

Coke is tasty and coke is toxic.

My grandma likes to encourage our ongoing education, so she sends us books and clippings.  One recent one caught my attention, it was for Coke.  It wasn’t for me, it was for a cousin, who apparently drinks too much Coke.  I was blown away by what coke can do, it is very bad.  And since I own a blog, I thought I’d tell you about it.

• You can dissolve a T-bone stake in a bowl of coke in two days.
• Many cops use coke to clean blood off the highway.
• Coke can be used to clean your toilet.
• Coke removes rust spots form chrome
• Cleans corrosion from a car battery terminal.
• Coke loosens rusty bolts
• Removes grease from clothes
• Cleans road haze from your windshield.
• Cokes active ingredient is phosphoric acid, its pH is 2.8.
• Coke will dissolve a nail in four days
• Coke is used to clean the engines of coke delivery trucks

So, I have decided I will try to prove the following items, check back later.  If want to find out more about nutrition, I found the information on a newsletter from www.functionalnutrition.com

I thought this was a nice photo, what a pathetic person, ruling a country then hiding in a hole, he’s crazy.

Pastime is defined as, “An activity that occupies one’s spare time pleasantly.”  I think pleasantly is a nice word.  Pleasant is what a grandma is.  Pleasant is when you take a nap on a Sunday afternoon.

I think drinking a cold beer with friends is a nice pastime, it occupies free time, and it can be quite pleasant, especially if you’re not routing for the Bills or Clippers.

So it begs the question, what makes baseball a pastime, more importantly, America’s pastime?

Baseball can be considered is an activity, sometimes the players run, not too much to break a sweat. They definitely spit and scratch themselves, that’s a decent activity.  Baseball is only done in your spare time, not even real players would play baseball if it wasn’t during their spare time.  Watching baseball can be pleasant, especially on a nice evening with a beer.  I don’t think the players think its to pleasant, especially with drunk fans yelling at you, critiquing your play, telling you your lazy, telling you that you should have a * next to your name.

With what I can think of baseball, it’s a nice pastime, but what I can’t connect is the “America’s” part.  I think calling something “America’s” means that it’s the best, the greatest, the toughest, have the most heart, and provide some action.  Baseball really isn’t any of that.  Baseball is simple, fairly easy to play, and contains about 5% heart and 5% action.

That brings me to my next question, if baseball is easy, played by highly paid “designer” athletes, why the $#%@!!!! did my fantasy team go 1 for 38 tonight?  I mean, that’s more than a perfect game for the other team.  That is an infinitesimal .026 batting average.  That’s so small, I think a sperm is larger.  I have two #$%&@ complete games against me.  I’m losing 16 to 1, to a guy that’s batting .143!!!!!

Why oh why do normal sports fans like myself put up with fantasy baseball?  There isn’t anything you can really do in fantasy baseball to change the outcome.  Anything can happen, the odds prove it, there is no strategy, no thought, and absolutely no reason to give yourself a heart attack over. Baseball is alright, but fantasy baseball sucks.

When asked, “joining our league?” I thought, “I waste too much time watching my scores, and I don’t even win.” But my friend said, “we’ve got to beat my brother“, so that sealed the deal, I was in!  So now I think, this is just like the time I retired from bowling, because it’s a dumb game and definitely not a sport.  So I’ve had all I can take, I’m retiring!!!! I sticking to just the gridiron, America’s true pastime, where the bad asses kick a little ass, and it happens to go well with beer.

I have done posts on the mech warriors of the future.  Now I am doing a post on the rock em’ sock em’ robots of the future.  This is a video of actual remote control robots that wrestle each other.  It blows me away at how moble they are.  Click here to watch Video.

Today is the day that all the Illegal Aliens in America are going to boycott work in an attempt to display their importance to the American economy. While I doubt that it will hurt our economy, unless it turns into a riot, I am writing this because I am tired of being quite and letting criminals tell us how to run our country. I encourage you to take 5 minutes out of your day to also write to your senators and representative, you can simply copy and paste this message into an email. If you don’t know their email, here is a link to a Congressional Email Directory.

Dear Senator/Congressman,

I am an American, I vote. Right now, there are millions of people who snuck into our country and are demanding we pander to them. They do not pay taxes, they do not want to be a part of American culture and they funnel our money into Mexico. Yet they want the same benefits that Americans receive. They form gangs, make up a huge percentage of federal inmates, and have been transforming the south into an enormous barrio. They leave Mexico because it is so horrible, yet they wave Mexican flags at their protests. They even have the gull to change our National Anthem to incorporate themselves.

I have grown tired of this situation. Two thirds of the 12 million illegal immigrants have arrived here in the past ten years. Yet, Instead of building a wall, there are now discussions of allowing amnesty. I will not support amnesty of any kind. I do not believe in rewarding the criminals who have been breaking the law the longest. As for worker permits, I believe we already have a guest-worker program called “green cards”. I am in support of legal Immigration and I am in support of enforcing the laws that have not been enforced; the laws that American citizens, like the minute men, are forced to enforce because our government is too impotent, even in these post-9-11 days. Therefore, I will make a deal with you. Unlike these illegal immigrants, I vote. I will monitor your voting record. If you vote for any amnesty legislation, of any kind, you will lose my support and you will never receive another vote from me ever again.

Thank you for your time,
An American Citizen