Epic Guide|Mostly Harmless

Today is the day that all the Illegal Aliens in America are going to boycott work in an attempt to display their importance to the American economy. While I doubt that it will hurt our economy, unless it turns into a riot, I am writing this because I am tired of being quite and letting criminals tell us how to run our country. I encourage you to take 5 minutes out of your day to also write to your senators and representative, you can simply copy and paste this message into an email. If you don’t know their email, here is a link to a Congressional Email Directory.

Dear Senator/Congressman,

I am an American, I vote. Right now, there are millions of people who snuck into our country and are demanding we pander to them. They do not pay taxes, they do not want to be a part of American culture and they funnel our money into Mexico. Yet they want the same benefits that Americans receive. They form gangs, make up a huge percentage of federal inmates, and have been transforming the south into an enormous barrio. They leave Mexico because it is so horrible, yet they wave Mexican flags at their protests. They even have the gull to change our National Anthem to incorporate themselves.

I have grown tired of this situation. Two thirds of the 12 million illegal immigrants have arrived here in the past ten years. Yet, Instead of building a wall, there are now discussions of allowing amnesty. I will not support amnesty of any kind. I do not believe in rewarding the criminals who have been breaking the law the longest. As for worker permits, I believe we already have a guest-worker program called “green cards”. I am in support of legal Immigration and I am in support of enforcing the laws that have not been enforced; the laws that American citizens, like the minute men, are forced to enforce because our government is too impotent, even in these post-9-11 days. Therefore, I will make a deal with you. Unlike these illegal immigrants, I vote. I will monitor your voting record. If you vote for any amnesty legislation, of any kind, you will lose my support and you will never receive another vote from me ever again.

Thank you for your time,
An American Citizen