Epic Guide|Mostly Harmless

The Super Bowl - We men know the players, the game plan, the stats, and of course we know who is going to win.

Ladies - don’t care much about the game, but would like to impress at the party. All married guys want their friends to know that their wife knows the game.

So here are some talking points for the ladies.

• The Steelers (white team) won 3 playoff road games to get to the Super Bowl.
• The Seahawks (green team) haven’t lost in green this year.
• The Lombardi Trophy is made by Tiffany & Co. at a cost of $25,000.
• The 10 most watched T.V. programs in history are the Superbowl.
• More beer is drunk on Super Bowl Sunday than on New Years.
• The 30 second ads cost $2.6 million dollars.
• Shawn Alexander (green) broke Priest Holmes touch down record this year with 27.
• The “Bus”, Jerome Bettis (white), only comes into the game to score TDs.
• The game this year is at Ford Field in Detroit.
• A saftey is when the team with the ball gets tacked in their own end zone.
• There are 7 referees on the field.
• The “Rolling Stones” will play during half time, Mic Jagger may show his nipple, hide young children’s eyes.

I have seen a lot of bad movies in my time; I have been tricked by plenty of previews. Some of the bad movies I have seen include Battlefield Earth, Mission to Mars and Resident Evil 2: Apocalypse. However, this weekend I witnessed the most painful movie experience yet. The New World seemed like it would be good, it stared Colin Farrell and Christian Bale and was about Jamestown, the first English colony in the Americas. I expected it to make white people look dirty and ill-willed toward nature, I got that part right. What I didn’t expect was there being more lame voiceovers than character dialogue. Now, being a fan of history, I thought this movie wouldn’t be half-bad; I was terribly wrong. The best way to describe The New World is to compare it to watching a 2 hour 13 minute cologne commercial. It was like a bad art film, that you wanted to watch not for the entertainment but for the challenge. I feel that I should have gotten a t-shirt afterwards for my accomplishment.